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RVMommaTo6

RVMommaTo6

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 5, 2018
Posts
2,139
Location
Rochester, NY
This happened months ago but I haven't been able to talk about it because I get too worked up.
I got a ticket for driving without a license. I insisted that it was impossible that I have a suspended license because I haven't been pulled over, much less gotten a ticket. They checked and rechecked and insisted it was true, suspended license.
Some research later, I was told that my license was suspended for not paying for a ticket that "I" received in 2012. It was in a town I have never heard of. The court said they had a hand written letter from "me" pleading guilty. I asked them to email me a copy of the note. There, in my ex-husband's very distinct hand writing, was a letter pleading guilty.
My best guess as to what happened... (Bear with me because you're going to think I'm crazy until the end) He is military and asked all the time if he's a trooper. I think his gf was driving and he said she didn't have ID and he gave his ID and said she was me. He knows my license #, my ss #, address, DOB etc. I'm sure the cop trusted him because everybody always does. Here's the nail in the coffin to my theory, this wouldn't be the first time he's done this. He's spent time in jail for doing this in the past.
 
I'm still working on it. I need to file forms from NY to get the case reopened to then plead not guilty. The DMV, surprisingly enough, has been helpful and easy to work with but town court uses dinosaurs to do everything so they have been very difficult to deal with. Everything is taking forever and "I'll call you right back" turns into me making calls every day until I catch her answering her phone every once in a blue moon. No voicemails have been returned. And I'm pretty sure I'm the first person to ever email this woman.
 
He is not active duty. That's a whole other issue I have with him. Everything he does is fraudulent. He is on full disability because of back, knee, and ankle pain along with asthma that all started when he joined and got progressively worse and worse. That was his plan all along, to get full disability. He has never had asthma and for years he continues to go to the gym 5 days a week (I got his gym records during another trial we had to prove that) and works plumbing as a side job. He put on a roof completely by himself, yet receives full disability. (And receives a lot, $5,600 untaxed every month because he has myself and the kids listed as his dependents, yet he hasn't seen them or even spoken to them in years.)
 
Sounds crazy.  I wouldn't know why this small town would not have sent something to you and your said license address?  And how would he know your license #.  I've been married 30 years and couldn't tell you my wife's.  I do know her SS# though.  Good luck getting it straightened out, sounds like a real loser, happy you moved on  :)).  If all else fails, hire xxx, never mind, I'm sure that crosses your mind often  ;)
 
If anyone needs to lawyer up, it is you.  It's way past time to take him to the cleaners.
 
Bummer Amanda. I know it won't make you feel any better, but what you are going through is really common with ex spouses.  Some have even been arrested and jailed because the spouse has forged their name to checks and legal documents.  Many others have had their income tax returns falsely filed and stolen.  Just be aware, ex's often know no bounds.
 
You wouldn't come close to believing me if I told you everything he owes me. I don't take him to court because he uses the kids to get back at me. I took him to court in 2017 and he filed for custody. The judge granted him visits and he did one. It was a disaster to the point of him getting mad at one of my daughters and leaving her in a shopping plaza in a town 20 minutes away from my house without telling me. She ended up calling me to come get her. I'm just afraid that if I take him to court, he'll see the kids and do more damage than he's already done.
 
Since he is your ex husband you need to go after him legally get a good lawyer to do it. You have suffered Damages and are thus entitled to compensation.... Times 3
 
A child advocate would easily pick up on this and report the facts to the Judge. It's upsetting to hear that an EX, can still be so devastating. Continue enjoying your adventure with the kids, his day will come to be judged.
 
Sure sounds like a classic case of identity thief to me,,, especially if someone other than you signed any tickets promising to appear in court. Its hard  to believe that any trooper or patrolman would have accepted face value that a person driving a car was anyone and send them on their way without positive proof. .That should be an easy case to bring forward,, Its hard to believe that you would loose custody of anyone of the kids either.  Of course lawyers across state lines, if you are traveling complicates the issue.
 
jackiemac said:
Can you get a new license and SS number? If so, do!
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A Very good idea...Sorry your having to deal with this. Keep your chin up and keep checking those Obits.....Sooner or later your wish may come true.
 
SpencerPJ said:
A child advocate would easily pick up on this and report the facts to the Judge. It's upsetting to hear that an EX, can still be so devastating. Continue enjoying your adventure with the kids, his day will come to be judged.
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Don't be so sure about this, wife's sister was in one of these messed up situations.  She married a guy, got pregnant, divorced him before her daughter was born.  The guy had drug issues, etc. never knew the daughter growing up, 11 years later decided he wanted to be part of his daughters life, sued for custody and was granted escalating levels of visitation, topping out at weekends and summers with him.  Of course my niece hated it, being forced to go visit this man and his new wife and baby daughter who she did not meet until she was 11 years old.  All along she told the court appointed advocate that she hated being there, it all fell on deaf ears, she would have panic attacks prior to going for visits, ended up seeing a physiologist every week, was nearly suicidal ....
 
Gene50 said:
You need some Biker friends!!!!
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I've had people offer various things and I always answered the same way, "I could never ever condone anyone doing anything to him, but if they did it on their own, I guess there's nothing I could do about" and here's his address lol

As for all the money he owes me, it's already been court ordered. He owes me an absurd amount of money but the courts just say he owes it, they don't hand it over so I would have to go BACK to court to get it and that just isn't worth the risk.
I'm not scared of him getting custody, that would never ever ever happen. In court in 2017 when he sued for custody after not seeing the kids for years, the judge gave him once a week dinner visits after ripping him a new one for his absence. He did one visit, which I knew wouldn't last long, but there's so so so much damage done in those 2 or 3 hours and no amount of money is worth putting the kids through that if he were to be given visits again.
I'll have to look into new ID numbers, it's worth at least inquiring about. He's used my ss# against me many many times. Even just little annoyances like he would go online and change my bank passwords so I would be locked out.
 
RVMommaTo6 said:
I've had people offer various things and I always answered the same way, "I could never ever condone anyone doing anything to him, but if they did it on their own, I guess there's nothing I could do about" and here's his address lol
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Have him come on down to Texas.  If he farts too loud he might just catch a death penalty rap. 

At least you would know where he is for the next 20 years until we sharpen a needle for him.

For the Asbergers make mine a double meat and cheese. 
 
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