When a full-timer is being hassled in the neighborhood

A man, full-timing in a white van, has parked a couple of times across the street from my house.  I was a little nervous about it because I don't know him but, I figured if he doesn't bother me, I won't bother him.  He just wants to get some sleep.  He left garbage last time he spent the night here, so I was going to say something to him about that because I hate picking up people's garbage.  Anyway, he parked Sunday night and came back and parked Monday night.  I live in a sort of rural setting with a nice view, so I understand why he likes to stay here over night.  This morning when I awakened, I saw a police car in back of his van and my heart sank.  I realized, my neighbor (who I don't like) must have called them.  Unfortunately, he parked directly in front of my neighbor's house, obstructing his view with his van.  When he parked further down the hill, there was no problem.  Anyway, I've called the police before when I thought a crime was occurring, but I've never called the police for someone who was sleeping.  Besides, where is he supposed to go?  His van is a bit of a mess, so he can't go to a campground.  I thought I'd offer to let him park in my driveway until he figures out where he can go but, while the police where here, he left.  About 20 minutes later, he came speeding up the hill, made a u-turn and sat staring at me though my kitchen window.  I looked at him (couldn't really see him well because of the distance) and then turned to go the door to catch him, but he took off again.  I realized, he must have thought I called the police and he was pissed.  So now, I'm worried.  I wish he was in one of the full-timing forums so I could meet him.

You know, if someone who is living in their RV, car, van, etc. parks in your neighborhood and you don't like it, why not just talk to them?  Find out how long they're going to be there.  Ask them if they need some help.  Give them some food, money, etc.  Why call the police?  Okay, I don't want 40 old vans parked in front of my house, but police?  I don't get it.  This man was just trying to sleep.  Where's the crime in that?  It makes me think about what might happen to me when I'm full-timing.  I may do just what this man did when I'm on my way from point a to point b.  I guess I will knock on doors to introduce myself and let people know how long I plan to stay and what I'm doing there.  It's a free country and, as far as I know, anyone can park on a public street for up to 3 days before they have to move their car.

Thanks for listening while I vent.  I just felt so bad that I couldn't help this man and also worried that he thinks I called the police.

You are more compassionate that I.  Sounds to me like he was moving around the neighborhood to avoid too much attention, but living on the streets all the time. Not a guy making a brief overnight stop for some sleep before moving on, but a "squatter" in your neighborhood. And leaving trash in your yard, no less! Not my idea of guest who deserves my sympathy.

What would you say if you talked to him? Ask him not to throw garbage on your lawn? Ask him to move on?  Or tell him to use your driveway next time?

Sorry, but I can't get upset about this.

Also, be advised that many communities have laws against spending even one night in a car on the streets. If you decide to emulate this guy, expect to be visited by local law enforcement, probably well before morning.

There is a wide semantic gulf between the term "full-timer" (one who travels full time in an RV experiencing the scenic wonders our country has to offer after having lived a full and productive life) and a squatter or a homeless person.  I think you may have experienced one of the latter in your neighborhood, or are perhaps making plans to be one?  If you think as a homeowner  they deserve kindness, perhaps try to help them.  If, as a howeowner, you don't, call the police or sheriff.  In addition to possible security threats (theft), they might possibly be a public health (sewage) threat.

I was just thinking about when I start full-timing.  What if I get caught without a place to park and it's getting dark.  I might stop into a neighborhood if I can't find a Walmart, but I get your point.  He doesn't look like he's full-timing because he wants to, but out of necessity.  I still don't think that's a reason to call the cops.  He arrives after 10 pm and leaves before 9 am., so he's trying to be considerate.  The garbage thing bothered me.  I live on a hill and the kids are always parking up here to neck.  As I've told them, I don't care what they do, but don't leave garbage.  I think if I'd asked him not to leave garbage, he would have appreciated that and probably would have apologized.  Anyway, I guess I feel bad because we can't just chase these folks around.  They have to be somewhere.  They have to sleep.  Not everyone can afford a 60K RV.  That said, I am worried about how angry he was and the fact that it was directed at me.  The man who called the police was hiding in his house, so I was the only one visible.  Still, I would have offered my driveway for a couple of days.  What can that hurt?

If you would offer your driveway for a couple of nights, dollars to donuts, you would be taking legal action, after those days turned into weeks, or longer. Hardly my definition of a full-timer.

I have been full-timing for 7 years and never had the need to sleep on a street, in a residential neighborhood. Just takes a bit of planning.

Tom and Margi said:

There is a wide semantic gulf between the term "full-timer" (one who travels full time in an RV experiencing the scenic wonders our country has to offer after having lived a full and productive life) and a squatter or a homeless person.  I think you may have experienced one of the latter in your neighborhood, or are perhaps making plans to be one?  If you think as a homeowner  they deserve kindness, perhaps try to help them.  If, as a howeowner, you don't, call the police or sheriff.  In addition to possible security threats (theft), they might possibly be a public health (sewage) threat.

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I understand.  I did want to help him but, because he's not "one who travels full time in an RV experiencing the scenic wonders our country has to offer", I didn't want to do it alone.  I should have talked to him when the police were here.  He could have led a full and productive life, but life got the better of him.  It happens.  I just started thinking about my own RV.  I'm planning to get an older RV that can fit a Doberman and a Staffordshire Terrier who can't be together.  It might be an 80's Wanderlodge, or a Boles Aero travel trailer.  I just began to wonder if campgrounds will turn me away because I'm in an old RV.  Will people look down on me because I'm not driving a 2015 100K Class A?  This is one thing I didn't research.

mikef said:

If you would offer your driveway for a couple of nights, dollars to donuts, you would be taking legal action, after those days turned into weeks, or longer. Hardly my definition of a full-timer.

I have been full-timing for 7 years and never had the need to sleep on a street, in a residential neighborhood. Just takes a bit of planning.

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I try to give people the benefit of the doubt.  I like to think that most people would be gracious in the face of someone offering assistance.  I don't know this man, but he wasn't causing a disturbance.  He's been quiet; just trying to get some sleep before moving on.  I just don't see how that deserves disdain from anyone.  I guess he's not a full-timer in the sense discussed in this forum, but he is full-timing in a van.  I'd be interested to know how he's doing it.  I've read about a lot of people full-timing in vans.  I can't imagine it for myself, but I'm intrigued at the mechanics of it; like people living in tiny houses.  Amazing.  That said, I don't want to risk my life and I don't know this person, so I guess I should stay away.  If I were a man, I'd approach him and offer to help.  I'd like to start a gofundme page for him.  I can't do that if I can't talk to him.  How sad is that.

Wow, 7 years and never got caught having to spend the night in a neighborhood.  Since I'll be group prospecting most of the time, I guess I won't be near neighborhoods, at least not in the beginning.  I do worry about getting stuck and having to spend the night in a place that doesn't welcome RV's.

Gary RV Roamer said:

You are more compassionate that I.  Sounds to me like he was moving around the neighborhood to avoid too much attention, but living on the streets all the time. Not a guy making a brief overnight stop for some sleep before moving on, but a "squatter" in your neighborhood. And leaving trash in your yard, no less! Not my idea of guest who deserves my sympathy.

What would you say if you talked to him? Ask him not to throw garbage on your lawn? Ask him to move on?  Or tell him to use your driveway next time?

Sorry, but I can't get upset about this.

Also, be advised that many communities have laws against spending even one night in a car on the streets. If you decide to emulate this guy, expect to be visited by local law enforcement, probably well before morning.

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Well, you were right on the mark. I found out that we have an ordinance that disallows sleeping in your car overnight on public streets.  Sooo, I've changed my tune. There are two Walmarts within 18 miles of here.  He can go sleep there.  I felt bad for him, but not anymore.

You'd do well to call the police and have these transients shooed away, many of them will empty their tanks in the gutters
and then move on. They've got no business whatsoever parking in anyone's neighborhood. There are RV parks for that sort of thing.

Having had fabulously good times and some super tough times... I say show a little compassion.  The world needs more compassion.

Sometimes folks fall on hard times and coupled with the troubles comes incredible loneliness and often confusion. Sometimes folks just need a hand-up, not a hand out.

Heaven help us all if we accidentally fall on rough times and end up on the "homeless" list. There is this awful perception that all "homeless" folks are bad people. Sometimes the domino falls and it just keeps falling. The domino effect...

When I was terribly ill and living in my RV, I was parked in a very bad situation but extremely weak. A compassionate couple found out about my plight inviting me to come park on their land while I recuperated. I graciously took them up on their offer. Many days I was too weak to get out of bed, but they kept knocking on my door shoving soup and sandwiches at me. They went way out of their way to help me out and as I began to get well, I tried my best to repay them by helping them out around their house. I will never forget them or their kindness. I went to visit them awhile back and was extolling on their compassion; how it changed my life and gave me a "hand-up" to get well and get going again. They looked at me with total confusion and said "We did what any decent person would have done, what you would have done, what we hope someone would do for us if we were in a bad situation. It was no big deal!"

Well it was a big deal to me.

I guess karma finally caught up to them. I found out when a friend of theirs was dying, seemingly abandoned by his family, they nursed him at their home in his final days which stretched out to two years of debilitating illness. I visited them and helped out with his care to give them a break. A few months later, when he died, they found out he had redone his will leaving them his house (it was sitting empty in another town) life insurance proceeds and a huge pile of savings and stocks. When his "long lost" brother showed up to collect the estate... he was in for quite a shock.

Sometimes a little compassion never hurts.

Having said all that... I was once walking through a town carrying half of a sub sandwich. It was neatly wrapped, sliced in half, I had eaten half and was saving half for later. A woman in dirty clothes came up to me and I smiled. She asked me for money to buy food. I handed her my sandwich raving about how delicious it was and rattling off the ingredients.

Perhaps she was drug crazed (others said so later) but I gently handed her the sandwich. She threw it on the ground then jumped on it with her foot until it was a flattened mess. She yelled at me "I asked for money not food!" Then she stomped off. So sad to find out later , she was consumed by a nasty drug habit.

Life is goof.

Being down & out is worthy of compassion, but being down & out doesn't give carte blanche to leave your trash on someone's lawn. For me, that single item moved the guy from the "possibly deserving" category to "bum".  There is no excuse for that sort of thing - there are dumpsters everywhere. Besides, he's not going hungry - he is buying stuff and so has trash to dispose of. And he buys gas for the van.  I don't see that any compassion is called for here - the guy is just exploiting the community any way he can.

He arrives after 10 pm and leaves before 9 am., so he's trying to be considerate.

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Or trying not to get caught doing something he knows is illegal. Is a burglar being considerate if he waits until you leave your home to break in?

A man, full-timing in a white van, has parked a couple of times across the street from my house

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Again, that's NOT a person grabbing some sleep before traveling on the next day. He is hanging out in the area and changing his overnight spot daily to avoid being conspicious.

tunie said:

I was just thinking about when I start full-timing.  What if I get caught without a place to park and it's getting dark.

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There is an invention called the Internet which is full of lists of places you can legally camp overnight. There is a great website called Overnight RV Parking:

http://www.overnightrvparking.com/

which has 12,000 spots in their database you can access for about $25 a year.

If you are full timing then the odds are you won't get caught without a place to park. Full timers do not just wander around aimlessly and suddenly notice it is dark and time to park. Gas is expensive. Having a destination is a priority. You plan every move you make well in advance. Anyone wandering around aimlessly, sleeping where ever and throwing trash around is not a full timer, they are a bum.

We live in the rural preservation neighborhood outside of Las Vegas and now and again we catch folks "camped" out behind our property...we always stop, ask what they are doing, and ask them to leave. I haven't had to call the police...yet.

We all feel compassion for people that are having a a hard time.

But helping a bunch of homeless people can end up like feeding the pigeons .... Very soon you have a lot of birds and bird crap all over you.

I do admire your compassion, Tunie, but this story has not one, but two, red flags. One is the aforementioned trash. There is no excuse for that. Worse, the fact that he returned after the police told him to leave and, apparently, glared at you. Sure it could have simply meant, "How could you do that??? ." But it also, and probably more likely, a sign of anger and perhaps aggression, let alone jumping to an incorrect conclusion.

I'd be keeping an eye out the next few days.

I can practically hear the ominous Forensic Files theme playing as the narrator says, "Most everyone in Appleville liked, Tunie, but on that warm summer night somebody didn't." Okay that might be going a bit too far!




Michael

If it had been thirty years ago, I wouldn't have seen a problem with him staying overnight. And probably back then there wouldn't have been trash dumped in your yard. People have lost respect for other people. Don't feel bad. I would have been the first to call the PD.

Tunie, I just would like to say I think you are an amazing, compassionate, understanding and caring person, and if there were more people like you, the world would be a much better place. That being said, please be very careful when you think about approaching guys like this. It could be dangerous. You seem to have a good, pure heart, but not everyone does. He doesn't sound like a good guy. Leaving trash is inconsiderable and rude and shows what kind of person he may be. Coming back after the police sent him off is a red red flag.

I have lived in my RV for several months now for lack of employment and money to afford an apartment, but not once have I spent the night in a residential neighborhood. I go from Walmart to Walmart, not even staying at a particular Walmart more than once a week because I don't wanna be a bother to anyone. If there's no Walmart, I stay at truck stops, every once in a while at a campground when I need a dump station. I drive to rest areas on the freeways to leave my trash there in the designated boxes.

What I am trying to say is, even if life is giving you a hard time, there are ways to deal with it without bothering others... The fact that this guy chose to do the illegal thing and sleep in his car on a public street while leaving trash behind shows that he is not a good person and probably wouldn't appreciate your compassion.

By the way, the guy should be happy he only got the police called on him. I once parked my RV in front of a friends house while I had dinner with her, apparently one of the neighbors got pissed, and instead of talking to me, got his gun and shot my window! My RV was there for not even two hours. True story :-(  Have had to live with tape on my window for 3 months now because I couldn't afford the repair. So if you still wanna do a gofundme, you could do one for me please ;-)

Please be careful, also when you are traveling yourself! If you'd be traveling alone as a woman and actually end up having to spend the night in a place without Walmart or Truck Stop, it's a good idea to ask the local police where there is a safe place to spend the night. I did that once, and they offered me to stay on their parking lot

Forgot to say, yes, some campgrounds will turn you away with an older RV, but there's plenty that won't. Only happened to me once. And Walmart certainly doesn't care about what age your RV is. I see everything from 1970s to brand new RVs on Walmart lots. And as I said, if there is no Walmart (or one that doesn't allow RV overnight parking), look for truck stops or ask the police. Sometimes I have also stayed at restaurant or mall parking lots. Just gotta check with the manager or security if it's ok. If you explain them you are a woman traveling alone and couldn't find a place to spend the night, most places let you stay for one night. At least that has been my experience.

We were getting a different car parked outside our house every day, and the cars would disappear every afternoon/evening. We had no idea who they belonged to; I asked neighbors, but nobody knew. We live on a dead-end street, so it couldn't have been someone dropping off a car on their way to work.

After several weeks (maybe a couple of months), I happened to see a Highway Patrol officer taking a coffee break at Starbucks, and I asked him if he could figure it out and stop it. He came by, ran a plate, and said he'd call the guy. I subsequently found out that he never did call. But, one day I was talking to a neighbor and mentioned the cars; He said "Those are my son's (who lives in a nearby town); He's wheeling and dealing cars and has nowhere to store them, so he parks them on different streets". This was the only neighbor I hadn't previously talked to  :-[

I have to add my story to this question of parking and sleeping overnight in a van. Several years ago my ex wife confronted our daughter about the need for her to sleep in her Honda Quest in my daughters driveway. They live in a gated community with a HOA that is fairly rigid. When my daughter explained the situation and disallowed her stay my ex became furious and left to sleep elsewhere.

My daughters family went on vacation a couple of weeks later and when they returned someone had put oil soaked newspapers around the house and set fire to several of them.  I guess the house would have burnt down if the perp had known how to light a fire properly. We have the feeling it was her mother trying to get revenge. One of the many reasons she is an EX.