This newbie is a bit overwhelmed and stressed

Here's something new that I haven't seen mentioned in my short time on this forum. I apologize for this lengthy post.

Quick backstory.

I'm 62, wife is 60. I took an excellent early retirement package at work and my last day is 6/30. We decided to use this as an opportunity to travel around the USA in an RV for awhile. We spent a few months over the winter looking around, looking at floorplans, going to shows and ended up buying a barely used '14 Keystone Laredo 294RK travel trailer. It really is in excellent condition and, most importantly, my wife really likes the floorplan.    So, right now, we're looking for a tow vehicle and have our eyes on a '14 F-250.

In the past, we've been tent campers, preferring more remote campgrounds that are better for tents, i.e. more spread out, quiet. We've taken camping vacations to various places, and have sometimes done a combination camping/inn vacations. We have both really enjoyed those vacations. We are both very active and like where campgrounds take us. We ski, XC ski, ride bikes (4000+ miles/year), hike - whatever gets us outside.

So, here's the issue. Since buying the trailer about a month ago, I have been really stressed out. A lot. I've been reading everything I can find to learn about what we're getting into. We've read "Idiots Guide to RVing", I'm reading all the docs that came with the trailer (appliances, etc.), I've been visiting this forum frequently and asked a few questions (Thanks so much for your help!!), I've been reading articles in the Library of this forum (thanks again!), reading different blogs - basically doing everything we can to prepare ourselves. I have to say, though, that I'm overwhelmed and stressed out about all this. Sometimes, I have trouble sleeping because I'm thinking of everything.  It's a little nerve wracking and we haven't even spent a night in the TT yet.

Now, it isn't just one thing that's raising the stress level. Being new to this, I think it's just all the hundreds of little things to think about. Some of my major concerns are below, but please don't answer these now as there are too many questions. I'll ask them separately in new posts.
- Driving with the trailer. I admit that we may have bitten off a bit much with a 34' TT for a first TT, but, well, that's what we have. It's been awhile, but I've driven other smaller trailers in the past and driven trucks. But, there's no getting around that this is a big unit.

- Setting the hitch up. We got an Equal-i-zer weight distributing hitch with the trailer and need to set that up - when we get the tow vehicle. Maybe best to hire a local RV dealer to do that?

- Trailer braking. Setting up the brake controller.

- Sanitize water system. We live in a townhouse so I can't do any work on the trailer at home. It is in storage about 15 minutes away at a horse farm and is a great place. I need to sanitize the water system, but I need water. And where do I dump the water?

- Logistics of travelling. Finding a campground while on the road.

- Battery power. There is one battery and it's a 24 size which is pretty anemic, plus the battery probably has to be replaced anyway. With careful usage, we'd like to boondock 1 or 2 nights occasionally. Maybe a generator....

- And a totally off-the-wall issue: My condo association is on the fence about allowing pickups in the parking lot. I've let them know  my displeasure regarding this rule that is very vaguely worded. The rule just says trucks are not allowed. 

This could go on. Again, it isn't just one thing, but it's the sum total of everything that's overwhelming me. I don't have any friends with RV's to lean on for info and feel kind of alone in this.

So, forget about all the details I explained above.
What's a good way to approach all the newness of this?
How does a newbie approach all this?

Again, I'm sorry for the way-too-long post. Any help/suggestions would be appreciated.

Thanks,
Dan Murphy
Hopkinton, MA

Welcome to the club you old "worry wart" !

First per your request I won't answer any of your questions.

Secondly I, (we) have been rv'n with pop-ups and travel trailers for about 15 years, and I constantly go through everything your are going through.

it sounds like you have the same make up as I do which is great for our spouses, since they won't be putting their selves in the grave early like you will and I will.

With all that said, take each issue in their matter of importance and believe me it is all worth while when you experience the fun and excitement you'll end up having

Jack L

merlinmurph said:

So, forget about all the details I explained above.
What's a good way to approach all the newness of this?
How does a newbie approach all this?

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Relax.  This is supposed to be fun.

Take small bites and learn one thing at a time.

I am in the same boat as a newbie to RV's. It is overwhelming when you jump in headfirst learning all of the different systems, parts and procedures.

You have to try not to think of all the things at once. I picked up an old old old Class A and started by gutting half of it. I spent 6 grand on electric which is more than I paid for the RV.

When you are feeling overwhelmed, take a step back and do something you enjoy. Give your mind a minute to rest. Learn a little bit here and there on each thing you want to accomplish. If you set a deadline it will make things even more stressful than they already are. Get some information on what you need to do then start lining up the parts to do it so you are ready when you tackle that item on your list.

One thing I have learned in this is to examine every last nook and cranny in the RV with a good flashlight. Pull out every drawer and look behind it. I found that if you only look at what is in front you won't see if there is something behind it. I found my shore power/generator transfer switch that way. It was behind my 110v & 12v panels where you can't see it unless you remove the drawer above and look down behind the panels.

Before bedtime, do something that you know will put you to sleep to prevent the RV thoughts from keeping you awake.

many years ago some of us did this without the internet!! we bought our first trailer and went camping the next weekend- never gave much thought about most of the "stuff" you talked about. LOL- she camped as a kid and that was good enough for me.
relax and enjoy, when your out camping there will be plenty of friends to meet that will help you along the way,  try not to get too consumed with all you can read about on the internet and in books.
you will get everything done as you do it and then move on and say that wasn't so bad.
go find a camping club in your area- great way to make friends with like interests

Welcome Dan!
You remind me of ME when I bought my RV.  I think perhaps we?re both wired the same way.

You?ve had this trailer for over a month, but haven?t used it yet. At this point you?re consumed with reading all the manuals. It?s a very good idea to familiarize yourself with how all the various systems operate but for me, reading all the manuals can often make things appear more complicated than reality. Believe me, the manuals are important, but the only thing that calmed me down after absorbing all this abundance of knowledge is applying it with some hands on experience.

To relieve your stress, I suggest a few mini-trips close to home to get used to your trailer and all its functions. This is supposed to be fun!

By the way? each and every one of the concerns you posted is easily solved.
(Our neighborhood covenant also bans trucks. They?re talking about commercial trucks rather than pickups)

Words from another newbie Dan.

I, too, am new to the RV game.  DW and I went out and bought a large trailer (to us).  We have only been out once (locally).  No major trauma! 

At first I was feeling overwhelmed like you.  Read these forums and look for any topic you think might remotely relate to you.  You'll probably run into it down the road.

Go down to where you have your trailer stored and just spend some time with it.  If you have water access, flush your fresh water tank.  Search these forums for instructions (if needed).  This will give you a chance to test your plumbing and get an idea of the layout.  If you can, hook up to electric and just get familiar with the system.  Relax!!!!  The more time you spend with the trailer, the more comfortable you will be.  Take things one at a time. 

When you get your WDH, video the setup and ask questions.  Find an empty parking lot and practice maneuvering your rig.

You won't be dealing with anything someone else hasn't already dealt with.  And they probably wrote about it in a forum.
 
A sense of comfort will come to you...if you let it!

Dan,

I'm even newer to the game than you are, and completely unqualified to offer you much at all...but did want to say a few things:

A) Your attention to detail and thoroughness likely contributed to the nice retirement package you landed...so look at that as a positive and congrats! 

B) I've also watched every YouTube video, bought books on Amazon, etc...and still feel uneasy/uncertain about the systems of the travel trailer we're ordering.  I've been trying to synthesize all of these different sources into one coherent "process" that we need to follow in order to prepare/pack/tow/set up/dump/return/maintain, but I'm just not comfortable with what I'm coming up with. 

I know we'll figure it out and learn things as needed...but I still wish there was a comprehensive "how to" that started with something as simple as "is it even turned on right now"? 

C) If you're a planner (I am...I love it), most states have interactive maps that quickly help you identify which state parks have RV camping and the types of hook-ups you desire.  Most of the reservation sites link to either Reserve America or Recreation.gov, where you can see layouts of the camping areas and individual sites.  Add in some Google Earth to get an actual feel for what the sites look like in terms of spacing, privacy, etc...and not only can the planning part be fun, but if you feel better about having plans/reservations (like I do as we begin our adventure), you've got that security blanket. 

I know that, for some people, this kind of approach would kill the spontaneity and fun of it all...but we're going into our first long, regional trip with concrete, dependable reservations and an itinerary that is still soft enough to permit some freedom and improvisation, if needed. 

D) You're right - they folks on here are pretty awesome and have been a big help to me as well - thanks, everyone! 

Good luck! 

You are in the right place. I am a learner, not a teacher here.

That said, you cannot know everything. learn what you can, practice, take some short trips to get the kinks out. Heck, boondock for a night or two where it is stored to see how it works.

HOAs are not my favorite. I live under one too.

Once you get your truck, if you are mechanically inclined at all, and can read instructions you can set up the hitch yourself in an afternoon. You may need to find someplace to torque the ball and a couple bolts. A local tire store torqued mine for me at no charge.
If you feel more comfortable paying someone to do it, then do so.

The brake controller,I don't know about installation. Mine was installed when I go the truck, but was easy to read the manual and set up for my  trailer

After that use the truck and trailer for a few short trips to get used to it.
Parking lot practice is not a bad idea.
Once set up in a campground with hookups, you can sanitize your system. If not a dump at the camp site, there should be on in the campground and you can dump on  your way out.

You will figure things out as you go. I'm sure you will find other RVers that will be glad to talk to you about things.

How do you eat an elephant? Take small bites.

First, thanks for the support. I know that one day, probably fairly soon, I'm going to get a good laugh at this.

I'm a software engineer, so I don't mind getting my fingers into stuff and seeing what's going on. I realize the TT is just a bunch of parts, and if something goes wrong, there's probably an easy solution. No way would I call myself handy, but I'll dig around and see what I can figure out. Safety is my main goal, as well as not screwing things up too bad.  :

First thing I'm going to do is make a list of stuff to do, stuff to get, etc., prioritize it and whittle away at it. We have plenty of time to get stuff done and are under no pressure. We'll leave when we leave.

I think it will help when we get a truck. I've spent a good amount of time so far just playing around with the TT, fixed a fan, and will be able to do a lot more with a truck. My wonderful wife and I are going to practice maneuvering and get a feel for this beast.

So, I promise to make a post here within the next 6 months and let everyone know that all this worrying was useless energy spent. ;D

Thanks again, and I wish everyone safe travels,
Dan Murphy

You'll get there Dan and like you said, you'll get a good laugh about it someday and I know that will be sooner than you think.
As others have said, take it out to a couple of campgrounds close by and close to a Walmart. Don't get overwhelmed with wondering about what you need to pack. You're better off going camping and write down the things you need and then go to a Walmart and get them. Don't pack things if there is a slight chance you may need it some day. That's a good way to overload a RV.

And while at a campground, if you have any questions at all on anything, just go introduce yourself to one of your neighbors and ask them for a little help. Most every camper will be more than willing to help you out. As far as de winterizing, that can be just dumped on the ground if it's the pink antifreeze. But if it's just the antifreeze and you're going to a CG with sewerage, just dump it there.

I live in NH near Rochester and if you have any questions, PM me and if needed, we can probably get together to answer some of your questions.

You've had good advice. Like any long journey, the pre-planning stress evaporates when you finally take the first step. The myriad of little concerns don't go away, but you deal with them one at a time instead of as an overwhelming wave.

One if the strange facets of joining an arcane hobbyist group is that everybody with one or more days of experience than you will tell one or two things that you absolutely must do or avoid. It's just human nature to try to impress a newbie that he is a rank novice and that us veterans know a bunch more. Easy to get overwhelmed by what you don't know and cannot judge for importance. A lot of what you have read & heard is probably useful, but little of it is of life & death importance.

So to add to your overwhelming data load...

Trailer brake and equalizing hitch set-up: If you can read instructions and adjust bolts on the hitch, you can do it yourself and you will probably do a better (read: more exacting) job than a RV shop tech. Who may or may not have much actual skill/training anyway. If you do it and follow the hitch & brake manufacturer instructions, you will alsmost surely do a better job.

- Sanitize water system. We live in a townhouse so I can't do any work on the trailer at home. It is in storage about 15 minutes away at a horse farm and is a great place. I need to sanitize the water system, but I need water. And where do I dump the water?

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There is nothing harmful in the waste from sanitizing. In fact, it is just purified water. Just dump it on the ground.

Battery: You will very probably want a larger one, or even more than one, but start with what you have and decide latter. It's one of those things that can wait a until you have digested some of the other gulps. In the meantime, I've written an article on battery choices that you can use to put yourself to sleep some evening. It's in the forum Library at Choose battery

HappyWanderer said:

How do you eat an elephant? Take small bites.

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Lots of good advice above!!

You can't get to the top of the mountain in one giant step.  It takes many, many small steps.

Make a "to do" list of all your small issues.  Your initial post is a very good start.  You can not do them all at once.  Pick one and get it done.  Cross it off the list.  Pick another....    Add other items as they come to mind.  When you run into an obstacle, come back here and ask.

I suspect you already know how to handle many of these issues, but are too overwhelmed by the big list to be able to focus.

Eat the elephant one bite at a time!!

Hey Dan, congrats on your plan and fear not. 

We're barely ahead of you and may well know less -- got our first RV in April, and we've taken it out twice.  For a while I would wake up thinking "oh no, how do you stop the dishes from rattling" or "where do I get the right water hose"?  But so far 99% of this seems to be common sense, Amazon, or pay somebody.  Like someone above said, this is supposed to be fun.  We're enjoying it so far -- hope y'all do too.

Welcome to the RV Forum, Dan.  Take a deep breath and stop worrying.  Keep in mind above all - we all started once where you are and amazingly survived it.  Best of all, for some of us that was many years ago so it evolved into a lifelong process.  Every time we get a new RV or car/truck we repeat the same process of trying to figure it all out but it really does get easier with time!

All good advice above.  Our Library (above left below banner) has a lot of checklists our members have compiled.  They're a great help to the novice.

Logistics of travelling. Finding a campground while on the road.

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This one is easy.  Find a copy of the Good Sam RV Travel & Savings Guide (formerly Trailer Life Campground Directory).  It has listings by state/province for more than 12,000 private and public campgrounds in the U.S., Canada and Mexico with information on their amenities.  Each entry includes directions, last year's price,  number of sites, type of hookups, types of roads, laundry, swimming pool, and other relevant information.  We use it constantly when traveling.

Another very good source is the Next Exit for use on Interstate highways.  It provides a lot of information about what you'll find at various exits including fuel, restaurants, hospitals, retailers, and some campgrounds.

Most of us also use a GPS.  We happen to prefer the Garmin brand but there are others.  With Garmin you can download various POIs (points of interest) which can be a list of Cracker Barrels, Flying J fuel stops, or the one we use a lot called 20,350 Combined U.S. Campgrounds which leads us to our destination campground.  By the way, we don't depend on our cell phones for navigation because there still are a lot of places that have zero cell service!

The good thing about RVers is they love to share their knowledge.  If you need help with something just stand there looking puzzled and someone likely will ask if you need help.  If not, go ask a neighbor.

When you get your truck and are ready to go camping, find a campground near home and go there.  Just spend the weekend (or two) trying everything.  It helps to be near a Wal Mart which will have an RV section (usually near the automotive section) or even a Camping World or other camping related retailer.  Some things really are RV specific (like sewer connections) but many items can be found at Home Depot or Lowe's.  You don't NEED RV toilet paper for example, but you do want one that dissolves quickly so most of us look for a brand that is septic safe because septic tanks also need good dissolving toilet paper that won't "gunk up" the system.

I hope all our replies will set your mind at ease and help ease the stress.  We want you to enjoy the experience and it will get easier once you have a couple trips behind you.

ArdraF

Except for the fact that you have already purchased your travel trailer, I can identify with you 100%.  I am a single retired lady who will be 60 in October.  Seeing this wonderful country has always been a dream of mine and having a motorhome or trailer has been part of the dream.  I am not analytical nor mechanically inclined.  I want to plug in, turn keys, press buttons, etc. and have things work...I have no interest in how things work.  I stress about all the hoses and plugs and switching from this power to that power.  In short, can I handle it?  Will I be more stressed than having fun?  Will I remember all I have read so far?  Sometimes I feel silly--I mean, it isn't like I am planning to explore the west in a Conestoga wagon pulled by oxen and no GPS.  And other times I just think I am being silly...I am Woman, hear me roar!  Will self doubt hold me back from something I want to do?  Or am I being wise not to take on an adventure I may not be equipped to handle?

Thanks again, folks. My wife often says I overthink things.    Do you think she knows me?

We plan on doing pretty much all the suggestions people have offered. It's generally simple stuff that should be done one step at a time. When you're overwhelmed, it can be hard to see that and you need to take a step back. Thanks for helping me see that.

@retiredcajunlady: I keep telling myself I would be extremely disappointed if I didn't do this. And I would be. Somehow, find a way to travel the USA. Maybe an RV is the way to go for you, maybe it isn't. My wife and I have both said that the worst thing that could happen is that we find it isn't for us and we end up selling the TT. No big deal.

@Gary: Oh, I've already read your battery article - very helpful - thanks!

To all, thanks again and safe travels,
Dan

@Gary: Oh, I've already read your battery article - very helpful - thanks!

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Hope you slept well after...