I have a little different viewpoint on your situation than the other posters have expressed so far. It may or may not make sense to you but here it is.
Buy what you want the first time. Don't make a plan to fail. You're 40 some odd years old. You've slept in dozens of beds. You've cooked in dozens of kitchens, used bathrooms, and dining rooms in dozens of houses or apartments. You already know if you want a bedside area to put a clock and your book at night. This is one reason we wanted a Queen bed rather than king. Kings typically have no bedside table. You already know if you can live with two burners or if you really want to burn cook gravy, corn, and boil potatoes at the same time every so often. You know already if you and the wife like to sit in recliners or couches. You know if you like a dinette with benches or a table and chairs. Do you want to use the toilet while the wife showers? Some couples do, some don't, but you already know what you two do. You already have a good idea that the kids will occasionally come visit. While you won't be buying something with a guest bedroom, you know you'll want some type of pullout bed.
So, sit down and talk about what you really want, make a list of those things and then look at a bunch of motorhomes. See how well they fit the list. When you're looking at MH's look at high end and low end. Take pictures with your digital camera. Make a note of which MH model each set of pictures is of. Compare the cabinetry, flooring, electrical compartments, the quality will stand out. Go back home and think about it. Talk about the different things you saw. Look at the pictures and see how they match up to the home you have now. Is there something that stands out as markedly different, other than size, that is good or bad? Write these things down, you'll never remember them all.
You should have a good idea of what kind of camping you'll be doing when full retirement comes. For my wife and I we lived in WA state most of our lives. We knew we would never be spending time in snow or cold weather once retired. We see 32 degrees for maybe a week each year. For us a "4 season" package, extra tank heaters, or added insulation wasn't worth the extra money or bother. If you intend to tour the country and don't mind being in the northern states and seeing the snow or rain or other weather, then that might be a consideration for you.
Do you enjoy dry camping for weeks at a time in remote areas or are you going to drive from RV resort to RV resort? If you do like to dry camp, then learn about generators, charging systems, multiple battery setups, etc. We don't dry camp often with our MH so that wasn't a large concern in our coach. We do however spend summers on the boat and sit for a week or longer at anchor in quiet remote bays. So on the boat we spent a lot of energy understanding the systems available and picking the right one for us. Again, you've lived enough life to know what you want to do. When you buy a MH, buy one that fits your lifestyle.
Just as an extra hint here, if one of you is a compromiser, always giving in to the others desires, that person needs to know that now it the time to be assertive and say he/she doesn't like something. Once you move into the box it's not the time to find out that the other person really did want a window on their side. So, brutal honesty.
Now you have a pretty good idea of what you want, what is available, and you should have a list of must haves. You can now narrow your search to a few makes and models that fit your requirements. Use those makes and models as your seach criteria for finding the right deal for you.
Now, someone said diesel pushers like to be used, and I agree. I didn't see anything in your post that said it was going to sit for 2 years without moving. Your wife sounds like a capable person. She can certainly take it out for a weekend camping with friends. You and the kids can certainly go down to visit and go for a vacation. Your wife does get leave, doesn't she? The kids do get vacations from school. What makes your situation any different than thousands of other folks who still work for a living and take their diesel MH's out for weekends and vacations? DP's aren't just for us retired folks who can go places more often. I think a DP is just fine for what you have planned.
Thanks again for your service and sacrifice. We'll see you on down the road in a couple years,
Ken
