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Kirk

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Oct 30, 2005
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Full-time , Escapee
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Krazeehorse33

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Aug 27, 2021
Posts
556
Location
Kenton Ohio
Some things to ponder as we get older
The inventor of the treadmill died at the age of 54
The inventor of gymnastics died at the age of 57
The world bodybuilding champion died at the age of 41
The best soccer player in the world, Maradona, died at the age of 60 and then...

KFC inventor died at 94
Inventor of Nutella brand died at the age of 88
Cigarette maker Winston died at the age of 102
The inventor of opium died at the age of 116 in an earthquake
Hennessy inventor died at 98

How did doctors come to the conclusion that exercise prolongs life?
The rabbit is always jumping, but it lives for only 2 years.
The turtle, that doesn’t exercise at all, lives 400 years.

So …
Have a drink, take a nap and, when you wake up, have bacon & eggs!

(It's a joke, I didn't fact check. Kevin)
 

RoadRaeJ

New member
Joined
Jan 4, 2022
Posts
1
Location
Shelton, WA
On her way back form the market one night, an Amish woman is stopped by the police. The officer walks up to the buggy and says to the woman "Your rear reflector is broken. You need to get that fixed - it's dangerous to be out at night like that - you might get hit by a car". "Sorry", says the woman, "I'll have my husband fix that as soon as I get home". To that, the officer added "and I notice the reigns are wrapped around your horse's testicles. Some people might see this as animal cruelty - be sure to have your husband take care of that, too."

When she gets home, true to her word, she tells her husband about the reflector. While he is fixing it, she says to him "Oh, I almost forgot, the cop said there is something wrong with the emergency brake, too!"
This! This is the laugh I needed tonight.
 

John From Detroit

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Joined
Apr 12, 2005
Posts
26,095
Location
Davison Michigan
At the age of 98, George Burns stated, “If I’d taken my doctor’s advice and quit smoking when he advised me to, I wouldn’t have lived to go to his funeral.”
When I took Phys Ed in college they told of one Professor of same who was always Running. the College board objected to him wearing sweath (you should wear a suit they said) His doctor told hin to slow down you'll wear your heart out.. The Proff bet the doc that in 10 years "I'll be in better shape than you".. Alas the Proff never collected on that bet.... The doc died.
 

John From Detroit

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Joined
Apr 12, 2005
Posts
26,095
Location
Davison Michigan

Works for me.. Seriously Went to a "Coffee with cops" event at the local senior center.
Well... Now they know what I used to do. So i went to lunch at a local diner. The newest officer on the force remembered me and accepted my invite to have a seat at my table while waiting for his take out.. Kind of nice.

NOTE: a lot of folks really wish I'd never gotten a job telling cops where to go. But hey. not may fault they stole the car.. Just my fault they got caught.
 

Edd505

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Joined
Mar 22, 2021
Posts
555
Location
Elephant Butte, NM
An Airbus 380 is on its way across the Atlantic. It flies consistently at 800 km/h at 30,000 feet, when suddenly a Eurofighter with Tempo Mach 2 system appears.

The pilot of the fighter jet slows down, flies alongside the Airbus and greets the pilot of the passenger plane by radio: "Airbus, boring flight isn't it? Now have a look here!"

He rolls his jet on its back, accelerates, breaks through the sound barrier, rises rapidly to a dizzying height, then swoops down almost to sea level in a breathtaking dive. He loops back next to the Airbus and asks, "Well, how was that?"

The Airbus pilot answers: "Very impressive, but now you watch this!"

The jet pilot watches the Airbus, but nothing happens. It continues to fly stubbornly straight, with the same speed. After 15 minutes, the Airbus pilot radios, "Well, how was that?"

Confused, the jet pilot asks, "What did you do?"

The Air Bus pilot laughs and says, "I got up, stretched my legs, walked to the back of the aircraft to use the rest room, then got a cup of coffee and a chocolate fudge pastry, and then chatted with the pretty stewardesses.

The moral of the story is:

When you are young, speed and adrenaline seem to be great. But as you get older and wiser, you learn that comfort and peace are more important.

This is called S.O.S …

Slower, Older, but Smarter!!
 

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