A Note From Alpena Jeff's Wife

[Alpena Jeff]

Dear, dear friends.  I'm Judy, Jeff's wife.  I've only met a few of you on this forum but I'm overwhelmed by the gracious and kind words, and love, you've extended to Jeff and me over the last few days.  Jeff loved our motorhome and camping, but most of all, loved the feeling of family and community on this forum.  I cannot tell you how much we appreciated the support and patience you provided us as we ventured into this new world of RVing.  I'm fairly certain we wouldn't have made it very far down the road had it not been for all of you!  You are truly a special, special group.  If I could ask one thing of all of you in the future ... don't take life for granted; don't sweat the BS, because that's all it is; kiss your significant other every night before you go to sleep; make sure the people you love know it.

ps. I'm pretty sure I broke the rules by hacking Jeff's account ... my apologies.

Grief is the last act of love we have to give to those we love,
where there is deep grief there was great love.
​

 

[Oldgator73]

JUDY,
I cannot imagine what you are going through. My wife is my best friend. We do everything together. We have traveled the world together and hopefully we aren?t done yet. We fight and we yell and we cuss. When we go to bed at night she scratches my back until I fall asleep. It sounds like you and Jeff had this kind of relationship. I feel so bad for you but I know you have great memories.  We all need to learn to cherish our moments. Most of us do not have many left. I wish there was something I could say to make it all better.

Rod Jackson

 

[UTTransplant]

I missed meeting you and Jeff at Kofa by only a day, something I regret. I don?t want to imagine what you are going through right now. May peace come to you in time, and know many, many warm thoughts are going your way.

 

[grashley]

Judy, I don't think you broke any rules.  Thank you for providing a contact point.

This is all so new, and you are so young.  I can't imagine...

Know you and Jeff were loved and our prayers continue.

 

[Back2PA]

Judy, it was tough seeing Jeff's account become active again, but nothing compared to what you've been through. Thank you so much for reaching out.

I came to know Jeff through many emails and PMs, and a few phone calls. Jeff checked in several times regarding your Newmar because I owned one at the time. I still remember our first phone call following some back and forth texting and Jeff said "let's just talk".  It was the greatest conversation, quickly became like old friends yet we'd never met. Just clicked. We talked in later communications about getting together, and I chastised him for poor route planning which failed to make that happen. (You did get within a couple hundred miles of me as you went north last year. So close and yet so far.) I had planned on going to KOFA but then my situation changed and I headed East. Then, when you attended the winter wedding and with Jeff's treatments, you made plans to head west instead of FL where I would be, I chastised him again. Nevertheless, I knew, deep down, that we would somehow successfully rendezvous, and I would finally meet this old friend (and you of course).

I was stunned and heartbroken to get the news from Kevin. I felt robbed quite frankly, of the opportunity to meet this man I so enjoyed conversing with, sometimes only a brief quip, other times longer conversations. Slowly, I've arrived at the lesson that you must not let opportunities pass you by. We didn't, it was just the way things worked out, but a lesson nonetheless.

He has called him home, for reasons known only to Him, we must take solace in that. I wish though that I'd had the opportunity to shake my friend's hand. Perhaps, if you choose to keep traveling, our paths may cross some day, something I would enjoy. In the meantime, please take care.

 

[Heli_av8tor]

Judy,
Not many times in life do we meet new people and have an instant friendship. But this is what we felt with you and Jeff. Your love and respect for each other was so apparent.

We share your pain and pray that peace will come to you.

 

[Gizmo100]

kiss your significant other every night before you go to sleep; make sure the people you love know it.

ps. I'm pretty sure I broke the rules by hacking Jeff's account ... my apologies.

I do kiss my wife every night...And I never do ANYTHING without thinking of her first.
My first wife passed away un-expectantly after 16 years of marriage. I thought my whole world had crashed. It took sometime, but it does get better. You just have to focus on the good times and take it one day at a time. I've been with my current wife for over 13 years. I never take for granted anything when it come to her happiness.

On a side note...
While my wife and I were still living in Alabama Jeff invited us to meet you guys in Foley Alabama. I was unable to talk my wife into driving for 3 hours for lunch.  ;D ;D

I don't think anyone will have a problem with you using Jeff's account.

 

[SargeW]

Thank you for checking in with us Judy. Your kind words help all of us to deal with the loss of Jeff too. I missed you guys at KOFA this year due to issues in our personal lives. That is truly regrettable.  But you don't need to be a stranger around here,  both of you were framily members of the RV Forum.  You are always welcome here weather you decide to keep RVing, or not.  Take care and let us know if you need anything at all.

 

[X-Roughneck]

it does get better. You just have to focus on the good times and take it one day at a time.

Hello my condolences, sorry for your pain.   

Gizmo's words are so very true.  Focus on the Joy. 

I realize the sun in not shining on your shoulders today. 

The sun will shine again.  I hope you find peace in he went out having Fun.  Is there a better way?

My heart goes out to you.  Sending you Strength.  Empathy.

John D

 

[Larry N.]

Judy, thanks for letting us hear from you. Unfortunately we never had a chance to meet, but I've enjoyed Jeff's posts here and we exchanged a few PMs about Ventanas and such back when you first got your rig. He'll certainly be missed on this forum, but you are certainly very welcome to join us on this forum any time that you care to do so.

ps. I'm pretty sure I broke the rules by hacking Jeff's account ... my apologies.

I'm not aware of any such rule prohibiting a spouse from using the account -- in fact I think there are some couples here who occasionally do just that. And certainly, if you have any questions about your coach, or just want to "chat," there are many of us here who'd be pleased to help, to "chat" with you, or whatever you need.

 

[Debra17]

Judy,

It was such a pleasure meeting you and Jeff at KOFA, I felt like we had been long time friends. The love you two had for each other and your happiness was so apparent. My sincere condolences to you and all your family. I pray for comfort and peace to all during this time.

Debra

 

[Hfx_Cdn]

    Seeing Larry's reference to chatting, we do have a virtual campfire ie a chat session every Wednesday night.  It is free wheeling and lighthearted and open to all.  Please do drop in any week whenever you need some conversation some of which is about RVing, but mostly it really is campfire chat about whatever comes to mind.
    I believe that we too are among the group who only met via the posts.  Jeff posts will be missed.  Keep well and safe travels.

Ed

 

[workingtorv]

My thoughts and prayers are with you through this very difficult time.

So so sorry for your loss.

I will keep your words in mind each and every day!

 

[Gary RV_Wizard]

Thanks for getting in touch, Judy.  We all miss Jeff around here.  Your advice is right on target and hopefully will be heeded by many.  Just over a year ago I nearly made my own wife a widow and can whole-heartedly endorse your message.  I had the good fortune to be in a hospital at the time with a heart surgeon immediately to hand or I wouldn't be here to do that.

 

[ArdraF]

Judy, there's not much more that I can add because the others were so eloquent.  Thank you for taking the time to let us know how you're doing and for giving us that wonderfully good advice which brought tears to our eyes.  I hope the love of family and friends has been a source of strength as you traverse this phase of your life.  Please know that you will ALWAYS be welcome on the RV Forum!

ArdraF

 

[jackiemac]

Judy, I cannot begin to imagine how you must be feeling. Jeff was a real pleasure to converse with and we will miss him greatly.

It would be lovely if you pop in and let us know how you are when you feel up to it. You are always welcome here. Sending you huge hugs.

 

[Alpena Jeff]

Hello to my new family.  I cannot begin to tell you how much your words and love mean to me.  Jeff was my heart and soul and I miss him so badly.  Life will never be the same but I will try to honor his memory every day.  Thank you all for reaching out.  I will stay in touch, I promise.  God's Blessings to you!  Love, Judy